Reading all my past posts only tells me that i havent changed.
I’m still so scared of everything,
i’m afraid of being a disappointment,
i’m afraid to embarrass myself,
I’m afraid of getting lost.
I’m scared of getting insulted,
i’m afraid of receiving comments,
i’m afraid of rejection.
The people around me are so brave, and strong. Look at M, shes so brave she opens up to us w/o any qualms. Look at R, similiarly shes like that too.
But i cant. Cos i’m scared, i’m afraid of whatever consequences it might bring. I don’t know how some people can actually control and keep everything in, i try to be like that too but sometimes it hurts so much. I confide in God everynight but somehow i feel thats not enough. Why?
How come whatever i write down it’ll somehow get jinxed or something. Sucks like shit.
